


the beach

by Daisy_PoisonPen



Series: Pursuing Happiness [3]
Category: Doctor Strange (2016), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Does this count as porn?, Established Relationship, Grief/Mourning, Light Angst, M/M, dunno, i need a drink, or plot?, so will you probably
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-24
Updated: 2021-02-24
Packaged: 2021-03-15 06:20:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29679708
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daisy_PoisonPen/pseuds/Daisy_PoisonPen
Summary: When you're living your worst nightmare, who will be there to wake you up?
Relationships: Tony Stark/Stephen Strange
Series: Pursuing Happiness [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1881361
Kudos: 21





	the beach

**Author's Note:**

> just going through some shit. tried to write smut but this came out instead. 
> 
> aka daisy probably needs counseling. 
> 
> minor content warning for beach sex and talk about death and grief. reader discretion advised.

* * *

Stephen’s nightmares drove him back onto the sand, now cool in the moonlight. The sound of the waves helped pulling out of those horrible moments. He couldn’t forget what Donna’s face looked like when it was lifeless. Sometimes he dreamed that she was angry at him, that she blamed him, and that lifeless face spoke to him, saying terrible things he couldn’t always remember but unfailingly made him sob with grief and panic. 

He sat down on a towel and faced the waves, wrapping his arms around his knees and resting his chin.

The moonlight on the waves glimmered and made the color of midnight on the water a deep, deep turquoise-black sort of blue. He’d never seen the sea like that before, and he stared at it and timed his shuddering breaths to the rhythm of the waves until he was calm.

He felt strangely numb, like he was still trapped in a nightmare. He wondered if he’d always be waiting to wake up to things back to normal. Normal where he was on the phone with his mate while _both_ of his siblings darted into his room and clambered onto his bed, interrupting his phone call and making him laugh and give them kisses and tickles before shooing them away, normal where he and Scott could sit and talk while playing games with them, and he’d feel like his family was complete, normal when his father didn’t look at him like he was a blight on his life, normal where he c—

“Hey,  _ tesoro _ .”

Stephen looked up and watched as Tony walked toward him, carrying a thick blanket and two pillows, as well as hauling a huge bag. He watched Tony set up with a touch of curiosity. He realized that Tony’s setting up a sort of tent, one that is really just a pop up tent with no zipper in front to close it. He then spread out the thick blanket inside, and motioned him in. “Want to sleep on the beach?” he asked charmingly, and Stephen just shook his head, smiling as he crawled into the space. He realized that he could still feel the sand— it was making everything sort of soft— and he could still see the moon and the sea. He reached for Tony, who crawled into his arms and wrapped him up in blankets and safety.

“What’s the matter,  _ cuore mio _ ? Bad dreams again?”

Stephen buried his face in Tony’s skin, sighing. “I keep… seeing her face.”

Tony nodded, his hands gently massaging at his back.

“I didn’t want to see her like that. I… can’t remember her voice already, and when I want to remember her face I just see…” slack jaw, open, glazed eyes. Blood. And that distinct look that only a dead face has. He couldn’t put his finger on why it was so horrifying, but that face was burned into his memory for life.

Tony kissed the top of his head. “I’m so sorry, baby.”

Stephen sniffled. “I miss what it was like when she was here. Everything is… I feel like I’m constantly in a nightmare. H-how do I wake myself up? Am I always going to be like this now? Just… constantly suspended, waiting to wake up?”

Tony rubbed his back. “No,” he soothed. “At some point, it will click that this is a new reality. And that will hurt… it will hurt a lot. And when it does I’ll be here to hold you and put you back together. And after that… it’ll be easier to remember the good things, and not just… not just that day.”

Stephen let out a soft sob. 

“When my parents died, I felt like they were just… on vacation. They’d gone for a drive, they were supposed to come back. I still caught myself thinking that they’d walk in any minute even months later. But then, you know, SI’s majority ownership got transferred to me, and it hit me like an anvil, you know?” Tony took a slow breath, matching the strokes of his hand on Stephen’s back to the waves. “I was depressed. I drank all the time, partied a lot, got in loads of trouble, as the tabloids love pointing out. Even experimented with substances I’m supposed to be teaching kids not to even think about. Being a CEO is stressful. It didn’t take long before I was slacking, and I had Pepper step in as co-CEO before I brought my company down around my ears. It was hard. But… once the worst of it was over, I was looking around at the wreck that was left behind and I knew that this was all real, and I had some work to do. It felt like… going back to a place after it’s been blown up or hit by a tornado or a hurricane or something. My life felt like that.”

Stephen asked, “how… did you know it was time to move on?”

Tony shrugged. “I just knew.” Then he added, “the difference between me and you is, you’re not alone. You have me, Scott and Quill, Vic and your parents, your other friends. We aren’t part of the nightmare, you know? We can help you ground yourself before you… without you shattering the way I did. And… we’re all here ready to help.”

Stephen pulled himself closer to Tony. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I wish I’d been there to keep you from shattering.”

“I’m glad you’re here now,” Tony answered. “You’re going to be okay,  _ mio tesoro _ . You’ll see.”

Stephen mumbled, “kiss me?”

Tony smiled as he obliged him, taking his lips sweetly, with a soft hum.

The kiss deepend slowly, naturally, each of them breathing each other’s air, not even really noticing the way their bodies entwined until they were both panting and uncomfortably hard, and Tony’s lips were wandering the skin of Stephen’s neck. Stephen pulled his arms and legs around him, around his  _ mate _ , and hung on. He wasn’t alone, he had the best person in the universe. Tony knew, he soothed, “I’ve got you, Steph, I’m here. I’ve got you,” over and over as he pushed their clothes out of the way, always touching as they undressed.

Stephen ached— not from grief or sadness, but from the tenderness Tony displayed with every touch and kiss. He was warm, as always, aroused and feeling  _ good  _ the way he always did, but there was something deep and comforting and loving that pulled in his chest the more he clung to Tony. He reveled in it… this ache was a million times better than the hurt that had woken him up.

When Tony finally pushed a finger inside, stretching and prepping him, he didn’t feel that nightmarish chill anymore. His eyes fell closed, and the image behind his eyelids wasn’t one of death anymore, but the color of Tony’s hair in the moonlight and the feel of his facial hair as his lips left kisses or nips on his belly. 

There was nothing like being with him.

Stephen was whimpering, getting ready to beg by the time Tony pulled his fingers away. “Tony,” he mumbled, “I need it, please~”

“Shh,” he said, crawling his way up until he was hovering over Stephen, his dark eyes intent on his face. A frown pulled his eyebrows together for a second, and they Tony’s fingers were in his hair. “Hey,” he said again, “it’s alright,  _ tesoro _ . We have all the time in the world, you know?”

Had he been that desperate? He tried to be comforted, but he felt needy, maybe. And this wouldn’t go away with one night on the beach. Maybe he just… wanted to be distracted from his grief for a while.

Tony leaned down and trailed a line of kisses from the spot below his ear and all the way to his lips. “Let me,” he said, and Stephen knew what he meant. He needed to let Tony. He didn’t need to  _ try _ , not now. He just needed to let Tony help him. Tony would know what he needed.

Tony pushed into him slowly, taking him gently, which was new. He felt every movement, every breath, even Tony’s pulse thrumming, racing his own. His body was deliciously on fire, and he didn’t know what to do except say his name again and again.

Each time, Tony responded, “I’m here.” When he came, Tony did too, and he said, “I love you.” And when he fell asleep, Tony whispered to him, “I’ll be right here when you wake up.”


End file.
